The Real Questions to Ask Senior Living Communities to Avoid Unexpected Surprises

Choosing a senior living community for a parent or loved one is a deeply emotional (and often urgent) decision. On the surface, the community tour may seem full of sunshine and smiling faces, but what happens after move-in day is where the truth lives. As a Senior Living Advisor, I am passionate about helping seniors and families know what questions to ask senior living communities to get a full understanding of their offerings and what their resident experience truly is each day.

I’ve seen families surprised by fees they didn’t expect, care services that weren’t included, or activity calendars that looked better on paper than in real life.

Before signing that contract, here are the real questions to ask to avoid unexpected surprises – and ensure your loved one receives the lifestyle and care they deserve.

Hidden Fees: What’s Not Included in the Monthly Rate?

That “starting at” monthly rate you saw on the brochure? It’s rarely the final cost.

Questions to Ask Senior Living Communities:

• What’s included in the base rent?
• Are there additional fees for medication management, mobility assistance, or dining services?
• How are care needs reassessed and re-billed over time?

Many families don’t realize the cost can increase significantly based on a tiered care level system or à la carte services (such as meal delivery to room when needed, laundry on site, or nail care).

💡 Pro tip: Ask for a sample monthly bill that includes average care charges for current residents.

Activity Programming: More Than Just Bingo?

A full calendar doesn’t always mean full engagement.
Look beyond the printed schedule:

Questions to Ask Senior Living Communities:

• Are activities actually attended and led by qualified staff?
• Do residents have a say in what’s offered?
• Is there variety to appeal to cognitive, physical, and social needs?
• Are staff regularly inviting and encouraging residents to attend and participate?

Ask if you can drop in on a real activity, not just view it from the hallway. A vibrant community prioritizes connection, not just checkbox programming. Knowing what questions to ask senior living communities can help give you a better idea of what their residents’ every day life looks like.

Staffing Ratios: Who’s Really Available?

This is a major concern – and one of the most important questions that often goes unanswered.

Questions to Ask Senior Living Communities:

• What is the staff-to-resident ratio during the day vs. overnight?
• Are caregivers trained in dementia care or CPR?
• How quickly are calls or alerts typically responded to?

Don’t be afraid to press for specifics. A beautiful building means nothing if there aren’t enough hands and hearts to care for your loved one.

The Contract Fine Print: What Happens If Care Needs Change?

Most families don’t realize that senior living contracts can include clauses about:

• Rate increases
• Required notice periods
• Limited availability of higher care levels
• Who’s responsible for furnishing, repairs, or damages

Before signing, ask to review the contract with an advisor or elder care attorney – especially if your loved one’s health could change in the coming year.

Final Thoughts: Ask Now, So You Don’t Regret Later

Senior living communities play an important role in providing safety, community, and care – but no two are the same, and not every detail is advertised on the tour.

The best way to protect your loved one? Come prepared with thoughtful, specific questions and advocate with clarity.